Secondary Traumatic Stress-The Silent Killer of Nurses & Caregivers

In a heart stopping, can’t catch my breath moment, my son Ryan was diagnosed with kidney failure, and my life was transformed instantly, immeasurably, and irrevocably. Secondary traumatic stress, the silent killer of nurses and caregivers, became my future diagnosis. It was a condition I had experienced in the past while caring for my mom when she was dying with cancer.

Upon hearing Ryan’s diagnosis, my head and heart disconnected, fight or flight hormones surged through my body, my autopilot “Nurse Brain” kicked in, and my “Code Blue” crisis programming began running my life. The autopilot program ran my life non-stop for almost three years before he passed. 

Fear and the fight to keep him alive became my primary driving force as one of his caregivers. The 911 story that played on repeat in my mind was “You know what to do, do your job and save him.” God and Ryan had other plans.

Like so many other nurses and caregivers I know, I struggled and juggled my other responsibilities-wife, mother, business owner, grandmother, entrepreneur while caring for him. I frequently beat myself up for not doing everything perfectly. I realize now that what I failed to do was balance asking, giving, and receiving help.

The “fear of acquiring and surviving COVID” was a reality that challenged patients, nurses, caregivers, and family members alike. The stress of caring for patients and supporting loved ones, while preventing spread of the virus to “at risk” family members, became an almost impossible task and a moral dilemma for me and so many others. It was the perfect recipe for secondary traumatic stress, PTSD, and burnout.

Sound familiar?

What I know now that I did not recognize, in the middle of both crises, is that I was suffering from secondary traumatic stress and on the verge of burnout. I could see it and feel it in the hearts and souls of the many caregivers and health professionals who provided Ryan’s care while he was hospitalized seven times during COVID. I saw it in their faces and heard it in their voices, but I could not or would not recognize that it was happening to me. My “Nurse Brain” was in charge and made sure my head and heart remained disconnected so I cope with my responsibilities and wouldn’t feel the fear and pain of losing “my patient.”

Secondary traumatic stress and grief became my constant companions after Ryan passed. I unplugged from my business and my purpose. I allowed a small group of friends and family members to surround me with love and support and nourish my soul back to life. I had countless conversations with God about the meaning of life and death and how to use what I learned about secondary traumatic stress and burnout to give my experience new meaning and purpose and to serve others.

God answered. I listened.

I have always believed, and have spent the past 20+ years, helping clients recognize the power to dispel fear, eliminate self-defeating habits, seize opportunity, and transform our destiny is waiting within each of us. I have spent thousands of hours teaching clients how to tap into their subconscious programming, utilize their internal resources, rewire their brains, reprogram unhealthy patterns, and transform their habits and health.

I used those exact same resources to survive and thrive secondary traumatic stress and professional burnout myself. I am now committed to provide the resources and support to improve the mental wellness of nurses and caregivers who are still suffering because of the pandemic.

I am committed to share my story and provide the tips, tools, strategies, and resources I used to recover from secondary traumatic stress with you and other nurses and caregivers. If you are suffering from traumatic stress and burn-out, I am ready to help you recognize what is happening, relieve your stress and anxiety quickly, rebuild resilience, and restore your physical, mental, and emotional balance. Let me teach you how to achieve and maintain your heart/brain connection and reprogram your "Nurse Brain" for permanent stress relief and restore healthy personal and professional connections. I did it and I know I can help you do it too.

I will help you remember how to follow your heart, trust your gut, and choose love and compassion not fear...because that is who we are and what we have always done best. 

Resources to Help Relieve Stress, Recognize, Prevent, and Recover from Secondary Traumatic 
Stress and Burnout